Archive for October, 2008

The Return to the Qur’an

October 27, 2008

After two hours of taraweeh, and up to four hours of tahajud, the Shaykh was bawling to Allah in his sujood, pleading with Allah to turn to him in repentance.

This Shaykh, hafidhahullah, would recite the Qur’an and he would have to stop reciting because he was weeping so much. He would recite verses of the hellfire and you felt that he was witnessing the hellfire, verses of Paradise and it was as if he was in Paradise, he would recite a duaa in the Qur’an and beg this duaa as if he was the very one, amongst thousands of people, making it for his own soul. And then, after losing his voice from hours of recitation and crying, he would go into sujood, and we could hear him over the microphone weeping, making tawbah to Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala.

Why was I not feeling the weight of the Qu’ran like he was? Why was I not feeling the weight of my shortcomings like he was? And who could possibly have more shortcomings between the two of us? Clearly, the most overwhelming feeling that I experienced, was that he, hafidhahullah, may Allah reward and preserve him, is one who knows, and I am one who does not know. And indeed Allah ‘Azza wa Jall says, “Those truly fear Allah, among His Servants, who have knowledge” (surah Fatir, 35:28). And he recited this verse over and over.

And so after Ramadan, I went to his masjid and Alhamdullilah I was blessed with being able to ask him, “Shaykh, I was here in Ramadan… When you recited the Qur’an, I felt that you really understood it…sometimes you would recite a verse over and over, sometimes you would cry and cry. And even if I understood the meaning of the verse, I would not cry like you would cry. And so I felt you don’t just know the meaning, but you KNOW the meaning. How can I be of those who know?”

(more…)

October 17, 2008

“All humans are dead except those who have knowledge. And all those who have knowledge are asleep,
except those who do good deeds. And those who do good deeds are deceived, except those who are sincere. And those who are sincere are always in a state of worry.” [Imam Shaf’i]

hatha Ramadan, gad gallatul ayyam…

October 17, 2008